I could totally be babied right now.

John, I needa hug! Waw!

You can tell that John and mine’s anniversary is tomorrow, because I’m sick again.

Last year when I first got with John, I sounded like RuPaul. And I remember when we first went out to San Diego, I sounded mannish.

I sound pretty gross right now and I’m feeling pretty sickly. It must be May! O:

The logic is totally there, I swear it.

Somebody, get this fat man off my chest. Its hurting me and I can’t breathe.

Because when I’m sick and can’t sleep well, I dream of weird shit.

Jennifer: Dude Karen,
Karen: What?
Jennifer: Last night you said you had to pee like five times and it wasn’t until the sixth that you got up and left.
Karen: What the hell?
Jennifer: Yeah, seriously

I dreamt that I was watching Lost In Translation in real life. Like, in Japan with Scarlett Johansson and Bill Murray and watching them interact. It may have been because I was walking through Little Tokyo yesterday by myself (well I was with the class, but I bailed on them for lunch. Didn’t feel like having noodles).

My life was set to a Porcelain cd. Specifically, this song. Don’t know why.

I dreamed that I bought this cute little black and brown puppy :] It was super adorable, but I felt bad because I didn’t buy it from the pound and bought it from the pet store instead.

My arm really hurts.

I’m sick.

Do you wanna do my paper for me?

So my sister just comes in, all excited about finding an apartment to stay in over the summer in San Diego for summer school.

So let me tell you how stupid that is:

Why can’t she just take it over a regular quarter? Because she heard stupid horror stories about the class? I’m taking the study of history writing, the ultimate horror story class and yet, I’m forced to just bite the bullet and take it. But no, my sister who can’t possibly do such a thing has to stay in San Diego over the summer, find a place to rent on a 3 month basis (or whatever), and pay that ridiculous summer school fee over at USCD.

Why can’t she just take another class at another school closer to home?

And of course, she comes up with a list of “but I can’t take it in a regular quarter!” suck it up; you can.

And of course my parents are paying for it. Just as they’re still paying for that ridiculous car they bought her about 2 years ago that she doesn’t drive for longer than a month the entire year that basically collects dust in the garage.

All the while, get this, my mom bitches about some stupid $150 dollar charge that might incur if I get a consultation with another periodontist (since she basically fucked up my relationship with the other one I went to in so much that they wouldn’t even see me) and my teeth get progressively worse.

I can bitch about how unfair it is, but its not going to help me any.

So right now I’m looking for roomates. I’m completely and dead serious about this. I don’t need furniture, I don’t need a parking space, I don’t take up a lot of room. In fact all I need is a bathroom and a little place to store food in. I don’t really cook but I guess I could use a stove or something. I can work all summer and ask my dentist to send me off to a college for my teeth (if they’ll have me), take a quarter off to be able to pay for college (I can taste my graduation date) while taking the rest of my shit ge requirements that I haven’t been able to take at a community college so I can keep my job . . .

I’ll be okay. I just need a place to stay.

At the risk of sounding completely emotastic right now and without any dramatics nor exaggeration,

I am absolutely certain that if I stay here any longer, I’ll die.

So today as I’m walking to the bus stop to get to my evening class, I walk across the farmers market on City Hall. I go around, sampling (read: surviving off of) the food along the way. Naturally, I stop by the little stand that looks like they sell pastries and try a bit of this cookie-cake looking thing in a little cup.

Oh. My. God.

Whatever the hell I just ate tasted like heaven. My mouth watered for more. Its called the Pecan Love Pie, which is this little cookie pie with pecans and stuff in the middle. And its main ingredient is (get this): Love. Who doesn’t want a bite of love?

I spend whatever money I have left on this tiny little pecan pie (which is also supposed to be made from organic ingredients but who really cares about that kind of detailing when you’ve got a little slice of heaven in an aluminum pie holder) and savor it. Because you can’t just wolf down the pie at the bus stop, you know? I keep it safe with me (guarding it in my bag, occasionally taking it out to make sure its not smashed) until I get home and holy crap, it tastes even better than I remembered.

I’m almost done with it and I’m sort of bummed out.

So yeah! If you ever are around DTLA and wander onto a Farmers Market, do check out the Sweet Spot stand o:

So Porcelain just put new songs up on their myspace list n__n. I’m super happy that they put up “Seek to Find”, since its my favorite song of theirs. In it, Ben plays this freaking amazing guitar solo that just blows my mind away. Although I must say . . . they’re one of the few bands that sound best live. O: I think they sound so much more powerful on stage (granted, the only time I’ve seen them was at the small Hotel Cafe where the lead singer was literally touchable if you just stuck your arm out . . the whole personal thing could have done it for me :B). Make sure to check their music out!! <3

I can’t wait for their CD :D

Its been an incredibly long day today. I wound up asking a coworker for coffee (I’ve not really done that since I started going out with John, but our schedules suck and he’s there the days I’m not :B) despite the fact that half the building thinks John and I have broken up while the other half just thinks I’m cheating on him with whatever male coworker I happen to be alone with at the time. But its okay, since he’s a really cool guy.

By then, I wanted to jump out of my skin. I wanted to pace around and scream. I wanted to yell and cry, and I didn’t know why. It could have been that ridiculously stupid office luncheon I had to attend, or the noise that my other coworkers were making outside of the door. It could have been the fact that while my section was swamped with work and understaffed, that the rest of the building dumps off their work to gossip away while crowding up the halls for some free food (that quite frankly, sucked). It was the stupidity of it all and it only reminded me of how much I hate my job. Slaving away over a shitty copy machine while the rest of the place stuffs their fat faces. It could have been that one of them made some snarky remark at me that I didn’t take too well. It could have just been that I was having a shitty day.

But I did none of that, so I had my coffee and tried to be personable. :B

“You’re not one of those emo kids, are you?”
Shit! My cool exterior is blown!
-”Do I look like one?”

At least the Porcelain track that’s playing on my computer sounds great [:

So I was having a decent day at work until I found out I had to go to the dentist.

Ew!

But then I found out that I wasn’t going to the oral surgeon, just my regular dentist. And the X-Ray technician is super cute.

Yay!

And then I come home and my dad goes “Hey, did you order something from Seattle?” and chucks a package at me. Did I? I don’t know, I can’t remember.

I open it, and its Issac Marion (burningbuilding.com)’s novel, The Inside :] I stumbled across “I am a Zombie Filled With Love” and fell for his writing :B So the next time I got paid, I bought his book =] I think I purchased it around 2 am or something which explains why I didn’t remember I ordered it.

And it came with his CD! :D

Yay!

Except, I can’t play the cd because my cd drive is fucked! D: