But no, as it turns out, my parents are just retarded.

So there is a sim card that they need to get down to her, or she’ll be left without a phone on finals week and wouldn’t be able to call anybody if she needed help. They sort of figured that my sister would have friends who are back in LA (on finals week? Seriously?) that can take it back to her. Well, my sister doesn’t have anybody to take it to her. So she’s left with these ridiculously stupid options:

1) Go without the phone on finals week and be unable to call her friends for help
2) My dad would go down there on Tuesday night after work and give the card to her
3) Mail it

So I told them about mailing the stupid thing. They were like “WE HAVE TO PAY FIFTY DOLLARS IF IT GETS LOST”. Geez, have you seen the gas prices? It costs about fifty bucks to get down to San Diego. If the card gets lost, we could buy a new one for less the price of actually driving there.

Why couldn’t the retards have just waited another week to sign us up for a new plan? My sister has finals and I’ve got dates with the dentists to attend to and can’t be bothered with the confusion that new phone numbers bring. Oh, wait, because the company would give my parents money if they signed up for a new plan with them.

Goooooooooooood they are so cheap and it just costs more in the end :/

They’re likely to send my dad down to give the card for her, since its just the stunt that my parents would pull even though Jennifer’s decided she’s going without a phone.

I just wish my parents used their brains more often. Is that so hard? I mean that extra 500$ is nice, but not when it fucks over your daughters in the process and something you could have just waited on. Sigh. I like to think that there’s some “other side” to this story, like if we’re short on cash or something . . . but even if we were, its over the lack of financial control my parents have with their spendings and ultimately their fault in the end. And I’ve lived with them long enough to know that this isn’t it and that they really were just being stupidly cheap.

Sigh.

So I come to work twice a week, Tuesdays and Fridays because of my school schedule. I work the minimum 16 hours a week.

Well about two weeks ago, we had a holiday on a Tuesday. Why my stupid ass department puts a fucking holiday on a Tuesday is beyond me. Well, other than the bit where the state is run by a fucktard. But anyway, moving along. I had to be out that Friday because I had to get my Thyroid poked and prodded; checked for cancers and such.

You think I wanted to miss work just to go to some superfun doctor’s office in Hollywood where they put me on a bed and tell me not to move for a half hour and make me listen to crappy music while four doctors hovered over me poking my neck around?

I came to work afterwards as well, for four hours.

So today my boss calls me in her office to tell me that I can’t be doing that because her boss (the fire-breathing shithead, FBS) told her that they would show me the door if I kept going under the minimum.

Right, because I do that all the time? Out of that one incident that I couldn’t get out of that I didn’t even want to be in, I get in trouble for apparently skipping all the damn time? I get threats to be fired over that one time I had to see the doctor and gave my boss notice of my absence weeks before the appointment?

Sure I could have scheduled the appointment so that I wouldn’t have to skip work. But then I would have had to skip school. And quite frankly, I plan on staying in school so that I don’t wind up being a logic-less, dim-witted tub of lard like FBS. So that I can take over her job, become her boss, and then show her the door by simply being the vile bitch that she is.

Lately, my boss has been getting on my case about every stupid thing that goes wrong. Aside from the obvious cases in which I admit that I’ve messed up on, here’s a list of all the other stupid little things that I’ve apparently also been doing that doesn’t sit right with my supervisors:

1. Listening to music on my mp3 player with my earbuds while I go on my mail runs.
Hokays, let me tell you about the attorneys, my coworkers, a few of the secretaries, and that one woman who was never without her iPod who do that. Of all the people, why is it me who is no longer allowed to listen to my music? I deliver my mail quickly (a job I’m not even allowed to do on my own, mind you) and I don’t bother anybody. I don’t sing out loud. I don’t have my music up so loud that I can’t hear when people ask me questions. I have a great pair of earbuds that don’t allow other people to hear what I’m listening to. My coworkers consistently go out with their music on and I’M the one whose apparently being unprofessional and what was that? Offensive? I only thought that listening to my music quietly with my earbuds on was allowed because everybody else was doing it including the people who have a problem with it.

2. Apparently I’m some sort of slut within the office
Hokays, 1: whether or not I’ve been sleeping with all handsomeish men in the building, its none of your damn business. 2. FYI: I’m only sleeping with one of the men, and I love him. 3. Is it really my fault that I’d rather not deal with women? We women suck. Especially the women we work with, because they tend to be lazy and gossipy. Hence, why I get in trouble for stupid speculation shit.

And is it really my fault that the whole world loves me?

Hokays, so on Thursday, I get back from my mail run. I’m normally supposed to go with one of my coworkers, but she’s kind of slow and she likes to take her time (the slowness has nothing to do with her taking her time), but she’s nice. We decided to split the floors so we both could get things done faster. It was a pretty good plan :B Plus, I just don’t like people helping me with my work. I don’t like the awkward standing-in-the-elevator conversations. I don’t like bumping arms. I don’t like finishing my half of the work faster and wanting to take some of the other person’s work so we could finish faster since that may seem rude. So anyway, I finish my portion fairly quickly and I stupidly told her the deal between me and my coworker when she asked if I finished my work.

Cus you know, its a pretty good deal. My coworker is familiar with what she has to do and knows where everything is, so she could take her time. I don’t, so I spend most of my time trying to figure out where everyone’s mailboxes are. Its faster, it doesn’t have any of that weird awkward silences and arm bumpings, and its actually a pretty brilliant idea. Only my supervisor gets mad for some reason, saying that it wasn’t supposed to happen that way. That if the wrong person saw, that she’d get in trouble, and blah, blah, blah. I’m not particularly sure why we’d get in trouble the way we did it before. She just kept shaking her head in a 3-chin-jiggle fashion while repeating “no” over and over.

I personally think its because she didn’t think of the idea herself.

She goes off on how she “knows what she’s doing” (does she really?), that she’ll get in trouble if the higher-ups saw me doing my work and not the way she wanted us to do it (oddly enough, they have seen. But they complained about the music instead?), and storms off all pissed and whatnot.

I try to tell her that its really just a matter of convenience, that its better for the all of us if we did our work the way we were doing it. And I told her that if thats the way things were, then fine, whatever, I’ll respect that. Instead, my boss goes off on her little tirade on how “things aren’t going to be nice to you” (wtf were we talking about to get that response?) and how I’m so naive for not seeing that we’d get in trouble, and blah. Sure, fine, whatever.

So she storms off next door to do God-Knows-What (probably to do nothing) when my other coworker comes in. He asks what’s wrong, and I told him that I may have gotten my coworker in trouble (the woman I’m supposed to do the mail with). He asks if its about the undelivered boxes we forgot to do, and so our conversation trails off to what could happen if those boxes weren’t delivered on time.

And then all of a sudden, like a fat black ninja who pops out of fucking nowhere, in pops my boss. She comes in, screams at me for “Gossiping” and “keeping secrets” with my coworker (you mean the one where we forgot to deliver those boxes? BIG FAT SECRETO! or how about the one where my coworkers flip her off when she leaves?). You know, if I cared about her stupid power trips enough, I would have been gossiping. If I gave a flying fuck, I would have been talking shit about her (I’m talking shit now because I’m upset). But I don’t really give a damn, so I was talking about something else. But not to her, since she’s apparently “heard” what I was talking about. Really? From the other side of the fucking room and with my mumbly sickish whisper voice? Does she have bionic hearing or what?

She flies off the handle (while all my coworkers are watching), and tells me to follow her to her office where she proceeds to make me feel like shit. I wanted to throw things. I wanted to yell, to scream, to tell her what a stupid moron she is. To turn my English Paper on Torture only applicable to her. That if she had actually listened, she knew I wasn’t talking about her. That if she had just asked, she would have gotten the right answer.

Accusing me of shit I’ve never said, assuming that she “heard” what I was talking about, embarrassing me in front of my coworkers

and they call me unprofessional? Come on, don’t be a douche.

Sometimes I feel like I’m trying to teach smart and sensible to a world of stupidity. Like how something comes off as so easy to my dense brain and yet people still don’t get it. They look at me like I’m speaking in a highly evolved form of English,or something.

Its rude telling people to do something where the only instructions they get are “okay, just give me the link when you’re done” and “a forum to throw pictures in and one for conspiracies”.

I think its stupid how people are flipping out because they’ve “lost” the side-scroll buttons when all they had to do was to shrink the window a little bit. Why in the hell did you need that side scrolling there anyway?

Or when people are in a panic because they’ve lost an icon on their desktop that they didn’t use in the first place and that making a shortcut to the button gives you a “different” program. And that the original icon, is in fact, in the recycle bin because they accidentally threw it in there.

It makes me kind of ashamed that I’m of the same species.

No thanks to you.

I’m really tired.

And I don’t wanna hear your dumb antics on how you can “help”, because everyone’s so trusting of a stranger whose only strength you can see online are the choice of words he uses. Because everybody really wants to hold your hand and skip through fields of flowers with you just because you think you have something in common.

And I’m really fucking annoyed.
And you’re pretty fucking dumb sometimes. With the way you’re arrogant and insecure at the same time. I mean, your intentions are good. But come on. This is Los Angeles. This is 2007. Who is really going to believe that your intentions are anything but honest?

Its a Friday night. Can you please just leave me alone for this one time?

Out of patience,
Karen

And to the rest of you: Does it look like I’m sooooooo terrified of asking for help? I’ll ask for your help if I need it. I’ll ask for your input. Or you could ask me if I’d like to hear what you’d have to say. But until then, could you please stay out of my business? I’m not so dumb as to walk into a complete disaster with my eyes wide open at the same time. Trust me.

And to another certain you: Stop harassing my mother. You’re all in your fucking middle ages and you’re acting like me. I’m pretty sure that says something on your character. However, I’m allowed to act like a giant ‘tard because I’m 20 and its in the job description. But you? You’re acting like a child. And yet, for some reason, you think that people should look up to you as their superior? Get a clue. If you’re going to accuse my mother of things she never did, talk shit about her behind her back, get pissed at her because you think she’s mad at you for talking to somebody she doesn’t like (3rd grade much?) — then guess what? You’re in no position to act like anybody’s superior. You’re an elderly. I get it. You’re older than me, I get it. But in no way does it mean that you’re at all better than my mom (or anybody else, for that matter) is.

Don’t make me wipe my ass with your paperwork. D: